Respect doesn’t come easy for Mee but in almost every other respect, I think I’m quite mature; at least, more than many. It doesn’t take much to earn my respect though, just know your onions … you know … well, plus a few other things (wink).
Nature is upheld by very powerful forces aka laws and these laws are constantly at work in an effort to keep a balance. One of these is the Law of Attraction. If you have read the bestselling book, the SECRET©, you’d have a vivid idea of what this law is about.
There was this time, after I had resorted into begging God to killing me and He’d refused, that I hopped on a bike and prayed desperately for an accident. There is a good reason the bible admonishes us to guard our hearts with all diligence. Needless to say, after several unnecessary bike-trips, that accident didn’t happen.
However, after a couple of months and lots of mind games, the physical finally agreed with the metaphysical and my I truly experienced all I had been programming myself to think about. I had the accident. A bus came out of no-where and the bike man ran into it. And boy was I scared on impact! LOL
Providentially, I did not die on the spot. I had bruises and cracked a few bones and even though the outfit I wore was ruined, my life had not been taken from me. I was rushed to a hospital and because I had an ID card on me, they identified me and called my office, from where they called my folks.
When I opened my eyes and regained consciousness, I hissed. Being alive was clearly not the end I expected. The outcome was wrong and totally unacceptable to me at the time. Why? There was nothing to live for. Not only that, but there was also not a future to anticipate. “Hogwash, right? Yeah”
Most of the people that I’ve heard and read about, and who have admitted to being suicidal, were females who found themselves in that state due to the nefarious activities of the karma they thought was ‘love’. Pardon my seeming insensitivity. I’m all for love. The true-love-kind-of-love; whatever that is.
Love is a strong force. But being the Younique chic that I happen to be, unlike these feMales, I found myself in a suicidal state by virtue of more flimsy reasons. The mind is a very powerful organ, able to deliver anything we can fathom. In the same vein, when it gets idle, it becomes an equally powerful tool for the any-Mee.
So, yes! My powerful mind was corrupted by negative thinking and thought processes and this led to the eruption of a “beautiful mind” – the kind depicted by John Nash in the so-titled Movie. There was a lot of negative thinking in spite of my relatively enviable circumstances.
By God, at 27, I had a doting boyfriend and a job with a fortune 500 company; a warm family and a pack of friends, but with all of that, there was a void deep in my heart which made it seem my entire life had been a waste and that it was best ended. BLUR! How sick can a person get?
This is why I am certain that depression (and suicide, by extension) is more psychological and possibly metaphysical than ordinary. Apart from that, suicide is a super dumb reaction. So you chicken out of life and then what next? Hell? Welcome party into heaven? All of life … I mean, the whole of LIFE, is nothing compared to eternity.
Eternity! No matter what challenges we may be faced with, that’s what should count! The hereafter! The END
But then again, I digress. Going by the introduction, this was meant to be an article about ‘Demilade’ and my seeming lack-of-respect for some of his friends, LOL. *sigh*